Pregnancy diary - Week 15 & 16

 14th April 2022 - Week 15 Day 6 !! - HUG , EMBRACE

I couldn't sleep well last night, deep sleep. Normally, I can sleep through the night until the daylight, until my alarm rings.

And the reason is....I need hug.

I went and hugged my husband while he was sleeping , he pushed me away cause he found his comfortable sleeping position and also he was asleep and also his was hot (sweating)

So he pushed me away.

Then I suddenly feel emotional. I was thinking... 

I want to hug you, I need to hug you to sleep , how can you push me away......

At that point of time, 

(Honestly so crankly already)

I was thinking....huh! Later my baby is not going to have your family name!

You are not there when I need you.

Why should my baby wear your family name, Huh!

Nonetheless, it was just the emotional though at the moment la.

Then on the second day, I saw this post.

里面有几句， 我的印象很深刻。。。

最关键的是

我告诉妈妈：

在安抚痛哭孩子的时候

连续三次

紧紧拥抱孩子

可是

他的双手是僵硬直放两旁的

一次都没有抱着老师

证明孩子一直以来

没有得到过父母的拥抱

缺乏安全感

这时

在电话一端的妈妈没有否认

顿时也泣不成声

later, I also found a similar post about ...baby can't stop crying if the parent didn't hug them. or baby always want ask for hug ..all the HUG related post....

In the comment section, most of the parents also comment because the baby wants 安全感，the sense of warm security.

More HUG related post

Comic style (Mandarin medium)

Word (Mandarin medium)

As I read the post, 我的印象特别深刻， 其实何尝是baby要安全感， 孕妇也是， 大人也是。Adult needs more than hug, they have sex romantically with their partner too. LOL

Comic style (Mandarin medium) 

Creator : Yee Ng 

So I think to myself

Okay la, I will mentally prepare myself to face this. I am not sure if I will become mad for carrying baby for prolonged time, but I will try la.

To get ready for that, I shall

1. Train my arm muscles - as baby will only get heavier as time passes by (the stamina to carry baby for long duration without muscle feeling sore or tired)

2. As for now, my plan is to look after my baby for 3 months. So after 3 months..I might let other to takecare of my baby. So I should be more discipline.

Work : Focus on getting work stuff done

After work : Give my attention to my baby so that I can carry him/her without even worry about the work stuff.

16th April 2022 - Week 16 Day 1 - Pregnancy symptoms surface

Recently, my belly is getting rounder.

Actually every time when I look at my belly in the mirror, I still real so surreal, so unbelievable! 

Then today, I feel that my baby bump is more noticable (even with clothes cover)

Then , it takes me longer time to walk

Then, I become slower when I enter my car seat, put on the safely belt 

and also 

when I come down from the car...

I am slower as in..putting on mask...drink water....carry my handbag and stuff 

Then, just down , during the dinner, for the first time...

I realise that I keep on sittng on chair, and take time when I need to stand up from the chair...

and also

I have more frequent toilet visit

WOW, I feel amazing..

my baby bump is growing...

All these little signs are telling me that my pregnancy is progressing! 

Eventhough I am a slow walker now...

I feel so proud of myself. 

Just now, when I was showering, 

I keep staring and touching and interacting with my baby. 

I feel so amazing...

I am carrying a new life in my body! 

Baba trying to interacting with you. Trying to listening to your heart beat and/or to sense your movement. He has been doing this since the third month. And he would heard the muscle movement of my digestive system. 

But well, it is a way of interacting with our baby! 

This experience fills me with great wonder. 

(Allow me to express how excited I am, despite many women in the world become pregnant and give birth, but I am talking this from my own point of experience and thought, also as a first time mummy-to-be!) 

....and I think to myself....What a wonderful world... 

Every day, as I witness my baby bump growing a little (sometimes a  lot ), it motivates me and pushes me to complete my to-do list so that I can spend more time with my baby (Also  a lot of newborn parents experience tell me that I  will spend a lot of time until I might get frustrated. )

Also, I want to be a great role model for my baby. 

Nowadays, I also tell my husband, no swearing word in front of baby (whether he can heard it or not)

17th April 2022 - Week 16 Day 2 - Frequent toilet visit

Guess what? During my 2-hour tuition yesterday, I excused myself for toilet visit for around 7-8 times.

At one point, I was even tired of going to toilet.

Later, as I reflect on this. I realised it was because I finished all the Laksa broth. The whole bowl of Laksa Bowl , no wonder I keep paying visit to toilet. It is a bit troublesome TBH, because I don't like to get interrupted as I teach.

Just want to rant it out. The urge to pass urine will be there whenever there is switching of movement between sit and stand. It was so obvious whenever I stand up, I feel the urge to pee.

And I wish that the pee could just come out at one time, but no... they like to split into smaller parts (That explain the frequent visit)....

so it is only a little (eventhough it is not so little) everytime when I pee.

I guess this is good? It give me the preparation that I might have live this way in the third trimester, hopefully not. So I would learn not to drink too much of liquid at one time after this. It interrupts me whenever I want a continuous duration to stay productive and focus.